I Have a Dream

I Have a Dream

Did you know that this speech almost did not happen?  But fate would not have it any other way.  This speech was meant to be heard, was meant to be televised, was meant to stir hope in people, was made to make people move into action.  Martin Luther King did not come to the March for Jobs and Freedom to talk about his Dream, he had another speech prepared but someone shouted and prompted him to tell us about his Dream.

The Dream was a sermon that he had told his congregation before, but it wasn’t what he was going to share with those people on that day.

But fate would not have it any other way.  At the prompting of that person, Martin Luther King modified his speech and shared with the world his Dream.  A dream of equality and love for ALL, not just for whites, not just for blacks, or Hispanics or Asians but for ALL.  The Dream that someone will be judged by their character and not by the color of their skin.  A simple dream but one that until today we still struggle to bring to reality.

Don’t get me wrong! We have come leaps and bounds from that fateful day on August 28, 1963, but we still have long ways to go.  We are not there.

Let’s use today not as an off day, but as a day to look inside and see how we can bring Martin Luther King’s speech alive in our lives.

Are we teaching our children to love others as oppose to hate?  Do our actions match our teachings?

When we stop looking or referencing at color and instead see each other as humans, that’s when we will truly be colorblind and we will be living The Dream.

The Magic Behind the Law of Attraction

The Magic Behind the Law of Attraction

the magic behind the law of attraction, The Secret, Having self-love, reading self help books, Attracting wealth and prosperity.
Have you thought of something so hard? Wanted something so bad? Dreamed it? Tasted it?  You knew it was yours, you were so sure, and then it was.  When I was little, I knew that if I prayed with fervor whatever I asked for it was mine.
I did not realize then what I know now; that I was using the law of attraction.  My energy, positivity, and knowledge that what I wanted will come true were fertile grounds for my dreams.  The years passed and I got older, a bit sarcastic, jaded by some life experiences and lost my mojo to attract the things that I wanted.  
Fast forward to two years ago, and I came across the book ‘The Secret.’  The title sounded super mysterious like a Sue Grafton novel, and I was intrigued.  What was the secret to people attaining all their wishes?  I knew that hard work and perseverance make things happen.  I knew about not giving up.  What I did not know was that ‘The Secret’ was something as simple as wishing.
Here I was, thinking that those people with their visualization boards were crazy!  Instead, they are all part of The Secret!
People who visualize; see their dreams coming true, are the ones that are making things happen!  
I know that some of you may have that ‘crazy’ friend that tells you about their big idea but don’t know how the heck they will do it.   You try to tell them about all the ‘what ifs’ scenario but they don’t care, they just know that they are going to write the greatest book about a young teenage wizard.   While they are telling you this, you are thinking ‘you can’t even afford a typewriter to write that book.’  JK Rowling anyone?
Those crazy dreamers are onto something! They are working with the law of attraction.
It’s like magic! No?
If you feel stuck right now or think that you are not getting anywhere, I suggest you read ‘The Secret.’  If you are not into reading, get it on audible.  If you are not into audible and have a Netflix subscription, it’s there! Watch it.  You can thank me later.
Create your vision board.  Make your dream house out of clay, imagine yourself walking through your beautiful red door, walking across the living room and stepping on your shiny hardwood floors, walking up the stairs and opening the door to your master bedroom.  Meditate on this, dream it, feel yourself there, and it will be yours.  
It’s so easy! But you have to believe in it.  It’s like praying, you have to know in your heart that it is yours already.  Give thanks for it and continue to live your life.
When I was little this dreaming and knowing that my dreams will come true because God listens to me was so easy.  I was innocent, and I knew that everything I asked for, I deserve because I was a good girl.  So for sure, I will get it! Duh! 
With adulting came some not so great moments where I lost that innocence, and I thought there were certain things I did not deserve nor should I have because maybe I’m not such a good person after all.  When I was wronged, I did not know how to forgive others.  When I wronged someone, I did not know how to forgive myself.  Holding grudges and self-hate polluted my heart.   I stopped asking with fervor, and I stopped expecting for the good things to come because surely I was not meant to have them.
Self-help book after self-help book, family, friends, and now my amazing husband have helped me to regain the peace in my heart and soul that I lost along the way.  I now know that I deserve all the good things to come and I know that they will come because I deserve them.
My husband was one of those things that I prayed for.  Two years ago, I wrote the characteristics of my husband in one of my notebooks.  I wrote a prayer for him, close the book and put it away.  I just knew he will come.  A year later this super annoying guy came to my job and would not leave me alone till I went on a date with him.  He courted me for months with Starbucks and lunch outings.  One day I decided to give him a shot, and the rest is history.  A beautiful dream that came true.
The Stepmommy Diaries

The Stepmommy Diaries

Marrying a man with children comes with a great many surprises.  Four surprises to be exact, two of those are 4 and 5 years old.  We will call them Thing 1 and Thing 2.
The fact is that my Additional Babies (Thing 1 and Thing 2) were hard to love.  I know that sounds harsh but it’s true.  It was hard to develop a bond, with munchkins that I could not keep.  Afterall, how could I love something that was not mine?  I couldn’t answer that.  

Each hello was exciting, nerve-racking and bittersweet because I knew that whatever we taught them would have been forgotten by their next visit or not practiced while they were gone.  I knew their visit would be temporary and I had to guard my heart and not become attached.
Being the Stepmommy was not all that I had imagined.  My expectations were crushed by the reality of the situation.  After a not-so-fun day with Thing 1 and Thing 2, I sat on the toilet and thought of how maybe we had all misunderstood Snow White’s Stepmom. She got such a bad rep!  At that time I could completely relate to her. 

I can think of some of the times when Thing 1 and Thing 2 thought I was the Wicked Witch of the West:
  1. Say ‘Please’ and ‘Thank you’.  No, you may not talk to your daddy as if you are his boss.  You must show respect in the manner you speak to him and always be kind to him.
  2. Yes, you must clean after yourselves.  Even in the wee ages of 4 and 5, you must pick up and help around the house.  This may be your temporary house but it is still your house and you must maintain it cleaned and picked up.
  3. When inside, use your inside voice.  So simple.  For yelling and jumping and getting the jitters out, we have this awesome backyard for you to play in.
  4. Your job is to play and learn, do just that.  Electronics are not your sole source of entertainment, revert to #3…the awesome backyard.
  5. You must read and write or scribble.  These two things will help you immensely as an adult and will make school more bearable.
  6. No gossiping!  Playing mommy against daddy is not nice.  They both love you immensely all you have to do is love them back.
The relationship between me and my additional babies is one of the hardest I’ve ever had to work on.  I can honestly say that it did not come naturally. 
It took me a while,
  1. To get into the rhythm of two munchkins coming and going  
  2. Splitting my affection between my own teenager Munchkin and them  
  3. Accepting that my Prince Charming had others he split his love with  
  4. Letting go of the little things that bothered me but I could not change
  5. Accepting their personalities, which are so different from mine and my own teenager Munchkin.  
It’s a fine balance, almost like a dance being a Stepmommy.  To love but not overstep, to be there but not take over the role of the mother, to accept their natural personality but groom them to be a better version of that.  

I’m still learning, I’m still growing.  Thing 1 and Thing 2 are helping, Prince Charming is helping, my own Munchkin is showing me how.  Everyone is so patient as I learn and get use to this new role and its lovely.  Wish me luck as I step intoThe Stepmommy shoes.

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